20 Things I Learned the First Month of Being 20

By Kylee McGrane - 4:58 PM

Time is flying. This semester is slipping through my fingers by the second and things are changing just as fast. Even compared to a month ago things are so different. On October 16th, I rang in my 20th birthday. A couple of days ago I realized that four weeks had already past and already, I had been through and learned so many new things. Without sounding pretentious, there are so many lessons I've learned so far that have definitely changed my outlook. While I'm sure I'll make many more mistakes and have lots of new lessons as each day goes on, here are a couple of things I've learned so far.

1.  Birthday's are SO important.
Birthday's happen once a year and it's the only time everything can be all about you. Buy a special dress. Do super ridiculous makeup. Wear sparkles. Go out and let guys buy you all of your drinks. Be a birthday princess, but, like, a nice one like Kate Middleton.
2. Calling your mom is a big deal for her.
I get it. College is stressful and busy and classes and boy-stalking is time consuming. But taking thirty minutes out of your day every once and a while to call your mom will make her day. I swear, hearing the sound of my mom's voice can make any bad day better.

3. Sometimes things end without an explanation.
Sometimes relationships and friendships end and things are never really finalized. Sometimes things end and you never get a reason and you never get closure. That's okay. Pick up the pieces and move on.

4. Your mindset is everything.
A 6 am alarm three times a week for swim practice is NOT fun but when I wake up thinking "I got this" it is doable. A positive mindset really is the key to opportunity.

5. Sometimes you just need to lay in bed and watch BuzzFeed videos.
Some days you're just tired and sad and that's okay. My cure all is laying in bed under way too many blankets watching BuzzFeed videos and laughing by myself. It's not pathetic. It's therapeutic.
6. The things people say about you are not what you are.
Just because someone said a nasty thing about you does not mean you are that thing. People can be rude and spiteful. You know who you are and that's all that matters.

7. Dress for yourself. 
Some days I wear sweatpants, some days I wear red lipstick, some days I wear cowboy boots. I'm sure that some days people think I look absolutely ridiculous but I always wear what I like and feel comfortable in.

8. College might not be where you meet your groom, but it is where you meet your bridesmaids.
I've met some of the most amazing girls in college and I have already drafted my wedding. Groom TBA.

9. Know the information on your fake ID when using a fake ID. 
Because not knowing is embarrassing and makes sneaking into a bar that much more difficult. Trust me. I know.

10. Make sure there is one song that you and your friends have that is "your song".
You and your friends are entitled to go absolutely crazy when the DJ puts a song on at least once while at the bar. Get a song and OWN it. I'm looking at you, Taylor Swift.
11. Making your bed is a big deal.
I clean my room totally and thoroughly every Sunday. By Wednesday, my room is a mess again. However, everything looks cleaner after I make my bed and almost always I sleep better.
12. Everything will be better after a good nights sleep.
Speaking of sleep, can I talk about how important it is for like a hot second? It's so important. Catching up on the sleep you didn't get Thursday night is critical. So do it. Also, everything seems much more tragic between the hours of 12am-4am. Sleep off your problems and it will put everything into perspective the next morning.
13. Avoid camera's while out at ALL costs.
Because at 2 am I never look as cute as I think I do.
14. Let boys break your heart but don't let them break you.
If there's anything I've learned from my relationships, it's that they teach you something. So when heartbreak happens, and it will happen, embrace it and know that you'll get through it, no matter how long it takes.
15. All those things boys do for you, you can do them for yourself.
You can buy yourself flowers and chocolates and clothes and everything else. You can do everything for yourself that you would want a boy to do for you. Romanticize being independent. Open your own doors. Carry your own books. Pay for your own dinner and hold your head up high.

16. Sometimes it's more fun hanging out in your PJs on a Thursday then it is to go out.Because sometimes hanging out with your bestie and making fun of all the people at the bar is actually more fun then going to the bar and getting drinks spilled on you and trying to pee while being forced to share a bathroom with three girls and avoiding eye contact with your ex all night.
17. Boys only leave if they want to.That girl that stole your boyfriend couldn't steal him unless he wanted to be stolen. If a guy wanted to call, he would. If he wanted to apologize, he'd do it. If he wanted to stay, he'd be here. If he doesn't then he's not worth your time. Boys only leave if they want to.

18. It's okay to love yourself.
Be selfish and make mistakes and make your decisions based on yourself. Stand in the mirror and tell that voice that says "oh my god I hate my skin" to shut up and the voice that says "dang, girl, your butt looks good today" to start screaming. Learn how to play up those things you love and stop focusing on the things you hate.

19. Stop looking and start living.
Stop, stop, stop looking for love and prince charming and for perfection in general. Apply to fifteen jobs instead of chasing after one. Be friends with everyone. Stop focusing on that boy who doesn't text you back. When you stop looking for things is when you'll actually find it. Who needs to fall in love with a boy? Fall in love with your life.
20. Be yourself unapologetically.Be yourself. If people don't like it, screw them. Then be yourself more.

infinite x's and o's,


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